Do not be afraid of an empty to-do list. It is in this empty
space that His Spirit has the freedom to create. We are each a divine vessel of
blessed imperfection, and this is best discovered in the margins of our day,
the places where our hearts bleed out and our words fall short.
Dear Saddleback family- What if we stop and meet with Jesus right here and now,
inviting Him into the worst and most hurried moment of our day with no agenda
other than to simply sit beside Him?
We should know that God sees the small things that nobody
else does, those menial tasks which make up the larger whole of our existence.
And so humility is cultivated in solitude, and grace is received in
silence.
I say this because Jesus finds me in the most unlikely of
places these days.
I will be driving down the highway alone and His Spirit will
whisper “Moses felt exactly like you do right now when I gave him the commission
to return to Egypt.” And I will feel better about my doubts, because I am
reminded that doubt is Biblical. Doubt is not the opposite of faith, it is the
unfolding of it as we grow up into Him. And I am humbled by the revelation.
I will be sorting laundry, a great pile of warm towels, when
He will suddenly draw close and tell me “I am going to speed up your healing
and come very close to you.” And I will feel better about my weaknesses,
because I am reminded that they are covered in grace and part of a divine plan
to heal both myself and the whole world.
I will be standing in the shower at the end of the day, questioning
myself about where I may have gone wrong in the last twelve waking hours, and
He will speak the words “No condemnation”.
Plain and simple, powerful and true; relief and gratitude come all at once like
a wave.
Yes, humility is cultivated in solitude, and peace comes on
the ringing ears of a silent room.
It has been the quiet times with Him that have been the most
fruitful places during this transition season of my life.
God has lovingly entered me into a time of solitude and
silence because He has a lot to say. I have been rendered mute in His presence
so that He can do the talking. For this I am grateful.
Pastor Rick has been teaching us that learning to slow down
and leaving room for margin creates space for God to work in our daily life. I
took some time off from social media and blogging to create space in my own
routine for Him to speak to me, and I completely agree with what Rick has said
to us:
“We must learn to slow our pace for a healthier life. Learn to be
content because human nature is discontent.”
A healthier mind, body and spirit requires Sabbath- rest,
silence, solitude, reflection, listening.
But who in this hurried world has time for that? To have free time is to be
rendered useless in this performance-driven society.
But our pastor puts it plainly:
“If you are too busy for God, you are too busy.”
Saddleback family, you have encountered me during an
interesting season of my life. I have been found by God and unbound from
slavery to emotion. I have transitioned from an upheaval of mountainous emotion
to a great plane of leveled learning. I
have been forced to slow down and listen to my body, my mind and my soul. I am
both victorious and still learning to be so, day in and day out. It’s one piece
of human nature at a time, observed, addressed and worked out within me. He is
moving in the silences, the margins, and the empty “to-do” lists.
I resist at times because I don’t want to heal, I want to be healed!
But humility is cultivated best in silence and solitude and
stillness. Contentment is learned in the quiet place. Healing is found in
peaceful acceptance of the right now.
Philippians 4:11
(NLT)
11 I have learned how to be content with whatever I have.
I have not mastered contentment myself, but God is carving out time to work on it within me. He is tunneling out a margin between my desires and my expectations, creating a space to write His own story which is becoming interwoven with mine, a chapter of grace that falls between the definite past and the unknown future.
In prayer this week, here is what I have heard Him say as I
have reflected on the sermons and teachings from the past few Sundays on our
campus:
“Daughter, rest now. I hear you. I love you. I want to meet with you.
Don’t try to control, analyze, explain or grab onto anything. Simply present
your needs to me and trust me with them. I am all around you. Trust my work.
This type of healing is slow but steady. Trust me with the learning process
that you are going through. You are not an exception to My story, you are a
main character. Now rest and allow hope and joy to heal you. Surrender your
fear, rest in trust, give your anxious thoughts to me. I am all around your
mind, body and spirit. I am consuming you with love. But consumed by my love
and be made new. Rest while I wash away your sins and make you new. I receive your
fear, anxiety and pain as a pleasing sacrifice. I am proud of you. I am holding
you. Rest because I love you. You are mind forever.” –Jesus
This is the victory for the past few weeks- I have learned not to make any decisions
when I am not in a place of margin. If I don’t have the emotional capacity
to slow down into silence and solitude so that I can dwell with God in peace,
then I don’t have the right state of mind to make healthy choices. This is not
something I have mastered, it is only something I have realized. It’s an area I
need to work on. And so I need to take the time to receive His teaching and
rest while He is working.
As Pastor Rick continues this sermon series about margin, I
will practice conscious gratitude for all the places I find space to rest with
Christ:
~I will not be ashamed of taking time for physical self-care:
yoga, massage, visits to the chiropractor, taking
a nap when I feel tired instead of charging ahead.
~I will embrace opportunities for better emotional health: life-coaching,
process groups, inspirational workshops.
~I will make room for God to speak- meditation, sitting in
silence, Scripture, journaling.
Pastor Rick made a statement which resonated deep within the
confines of my journey:
“I can’t keep charging without recharging. Hurry dries up my love and
keeps me from hearing God.”
I have led far too many charges in the past year, and I have
pushed away God’s gift of rest.
It’s time to bring awareness to the fear of stillness.
And as I make flawed efforts to get closer to victory, I
trust God to help me weave each lesson into my relationships and responsibilities
of daily life.
Saddleback family, it is in the margins that we will
experience breakthrough. This is about us and God and nothing else.
Do not be ashamed to have time to sit with Him. Some of the
most influential teachers I have read are huge proponents of significant
amounts of quiet time with God.
Jesus is coming into the deep places of brokenness within us
in oder to do a true and lasting healing. He is so proud of us and the hard
work we are doing to stop working so hard.
For every small step we take towards Him, He will take a
flying leap towards us. He closes the gap when we create a margin.
The empty places in our schedule can become the battleground
for the collision of our spirit with His. He is using everything, each piece of
our daily lives to draw us closer to Him, especially the vacancies.
Friends, it is in the quite pieces of stillness where
humility is cultivated. And humility is the nutrient-rich soil for blessing to
be planted and grow up in abundance.
Let us all meet and commune with Him in silence and solitude
this week, whatever amount you can give. He receives it all with abundant joy.
He knows how much it means to each one of us to carve out time with Him. He
knows what it costs to lay down our agendas, and He receives the sacrifice as a
good and pleasing aroma.
As we sacrifice our time to Him, he carries our burdens away
to make room for something new.
Yes, He honors our time as we honor His.
Do not be afraid of
an empty to-do list. It is in this empty space that His Spirit has the freedom
to create. We are each a divine vessel of blessed imperfection, and this is
best discovered in the margins of our day, the places where our hearts bleed
out and our words fall short.
Though I sit alone with him, I am not lonely because I know
that many in my church family sit there also.
And together we can each carry the gift of communion with
the Spirit with us into the work of our day and apply it to the broken relationships
in which we long to see breakthrough.
I love you, church. Let’s sit quietly together here in this
sacred place of solitude with our Savior. Let us surrender our divine imperfections and savor our Savior as He refines us in silence.
Amen and amen.
Rebecca
~*~
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